Grandmother Wisdom

It seems the phrase “I love you” is backward to what is meant. “You are loved by me” might be more appropriate.

Grandmother was a great source of wisdom, and out of her great treasure trove came the idea that one rarely, if ever, used the word ‘I’ when writing. Along with that came the instruction that one always placed themselves at the end of a list when writing or speaking.
“Me and David are going to Joey’s house”
“No, you say ‘David and I are going to Joey’s house”

“That was me and David making that racket in the garage”
“No, you say ‘That was David and me making the racket in the garage’”

Grandmother grew up in a different culture, one that understood the enormous influence of ego and arrogance. One that labored through language to tame that ego and douse that arrogance. Put yourself last in a list, don’t use the word ‘I’ when writing.

We have letters written among family members which date back to the civil war. Not only is the penmanship elegant but their ability to express themselves without using the word ‘I’ is impressive. There is something engaging when reading prose written with the ego of the writer suppressed and the importance of the reader and the topic elevated.

There is operational precedence in the way we state things. “I love you” places the precedence on the speaker. The subconscious parser in our brain knows that and might hear “I, the superior being, love you, one who is privileged to receive such adoration”.

Obviously, this is overstated to emphasize the point but what if we accepted that there is value in some of the practices of the past?